We Are What We Choose To Blog

Today is the first day that I update my blog from my home. So greetings from the red shanty on 11th Avenue.

To mark my first (triumphant) blog post from home, I'm recapping the miserable list of mishappenings since I arrived in this state. Read closely; these events may very well end up in a pitiful Ben Stiller movie someday.

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Week 1: State of California issues a rejection notice upon my (attempted) entrance. Yoshi the parrot turns out to be an invasive non-native species.

Yoshi the parrot is put up for adoption in a Phoenix animal shelter, after ten years of commraderie. State of Jackassafornia inspects vehicle and allows my entrance.

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Week 2: Danny Gomez receives a copy of my resume on the CBS lot and immediately passes me on to the higher-ups. He asks for an email copy of my resume to share around.

I accidentally send Danny the wrong file. Instead of attaching my resume for him to share, I send a nasty letter to Ithaca College about the lack of industry training I received from them.

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Week 3: I spend my first night sleeping on the floor in the red house. In the morning, I go to breakfast with my housemates.

Red house gets broken into while I'm gone. Burglar steals my laptop, camera, and iPod. "Unknown suspect fled in unknown direction," writes a helpful police report.

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Week 4: My internship company invites me to attend an animal rights fund raiser at the Riviera Country Club on Sunset Boulevard. It's a black tie affair.

As I get dressed to leave, I discover that my tuxedo has a hole burned through it from the car ride across the country. I wear a nice shirt and tie instead.

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Week 5: I discover, in the midst of applying for auto insurance, that I have been giving out the wrong house address for weeks.

I make some desperate calls to reroute a paycheck being mailed to the wrong house.

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Week 6: ... (in progress) ...